It’s kind of funny, isn’t it? We want to be something we’re not, but we don’t want to change to become it, do we? We want to be more like Christ, we want to be successful, we want to be loving husbands and fathers, but we don’t want to change.

Here’s a great question for you, guys, “How do you supposed we become more like Christ in our homes, relationships, workplace, communities, and church if we don’t change our hearts and mindsets?” To be honest, I don’t have a clue.

Change – the last frontier of our lives, yet the constant in all of life. Change brings life. Change brings new and with new comes life. Your body is constantly changing – some of you would definitely agree with me – but, it’s that change that rejuvenates life. A lack of change and rejuvenation ushers in stagnation and with stagnation death – death of the heart, our passions, and the mind.

God has been changing me lately – my mind and my heart. My life got to the point that it seemed that my anger was raising it’s ugly head all the time. I haven’t had to deal with my anger and its sinful outbursts in a long time. My outbursts scare Cindy. She reminded me that every time I get angry it costs me something – money to replace or fix something, my relationship with her and others, even my relationship with God. Something needed to change and change quickly!

Through some great counsel (thanks Scott) I’ve begun to read through a book that’s been around a while, but is having a dramatic impact in and on my life. It is T.W. Hunt’s The Mind of Christ. Did you know that you can have the mind of Christ? Do you realize that to have the mind of Christ is to be in complete harmony with God and God’s desires? I want that. I want to be so in tune with God that I’m free from the bondage of sin and sinful thinking.

Did you know that to have the mind of Jesus requires change? YEP!! Make no mistake about it, this is a process. It doesn’t happen over night, though there are some biblical principles that will make an immediate impact (change) if you begin applying them to your life and your relationships. I’m working through the process now, asking God to change my heart, my relationships, my loyalties, my prejudices, my thought process and I’m seeing God in a whole new light.

I’ve also asked some men, a band of brothers – fellow warriors who knows about struggle and life change – to pray for me and hold me accountable for my anger. They are. In fact one fellow warrior asked me about it this past Sunday morning. Thanks Terry. Keep it up.

Life, the life in Christ we can all have is about change. Life changes. . .we change, but do you want change for God?

As God teaches me I will share with you.

I would ask that you pray for me and pray for Cindy. Pray that God will give me opportunities to share what He is teaching me with other men who struggle as well.

Mike

3 This is what the LORD says to the men of Judah and to Jerusalem:
“Break up your unplowed ground
and do not sow among thorns.

 4 Circumcise yourselves to the LORD,
circumcise your hearts,
you men of Judah and people of Jerusalem,
or my wrath will break out and burn like fire
because of the evil you have done—
burn with no one to quench it.

When I read that passage the phrase “circumcise yourselves to the LORD, circumcise your hearts“, really jumped out at me.  Now I know we men don’t like to think about circumcision and I’m really glad it’s done at or near birth.  Don’t know about you, but I can’t imagine what it must be like to go through that event as an adult – my eyes squint and my jaw clinches.

Then again, GOD is using circumcision at a metaphor for his command for us to set ourselves apart. . .to cut away the things in our lives that keep us from being holy and readily available to God.  Things like pride, self-centeredness, unfaithfulness to God, our wives, and our families, eye-wandering when a lady walks by, surfing the net hoping to “accidentally” stumble upon a web site with some short-lived eye candy or intentionally looking at pornography, whatever it is that is keeping you from being available and set aside for GOD’s purposes needs to be circumcised – cut away with and discarded.

Men, we need to consecrate ourselves for GOD and His purposes.  And every day we put our feet on the floor we need to be cleansed.  So how do you circumcise your life and your heart?  How do you consecrate yourself for GOD’s purposes?

We begin with a personal relationship with Jesus Christ.  It’s through his shed blood on the cross that we are made holy and can have a personal relationship with GOD (Heb 9:21-23;  Col 1:22).  And, because we are human and we’re guys, we mess up.  So now we confess our wrongs to GOD.  1 John 1:9 says, “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.”  Then we repent – turn away from our sin and the stuff we are doing and turn to GOD (Acts 3:19).  We are to turn toward His principles and desires for our lives.  This means we will have to identify those things in our lives that cause us to sin and stop doing them and start doing those things He desires of us:  spending time with Him, talking with Him, being obedient to Him, taking risks for Him, faithfully loving our wives and children, and much more.
Next, I believe we must pursue the things of GOD – the heart of GOD, His righteousness, His holiness, His love, His mercy, His grace, His desires – so that they become a part – an integral part – of who we are as men.

This is where I am – learning about being consecrated to and for GOD and His purposes.  I am also learning that to be the man GOD designed and desires me to be I must circumcise those things in my life that prevent me from being readily available to and for Him.  I’m working through the identification process – identifying those things that make me unholy, those things that I need to confess and repent of before the LORD.

What about you?  Ready to become the man GOD designed and desires you to be?  Commit to circumcising your life and your heart for Him.
Mike

If you noticed each of the questions above were point at you – NOT YOUR SPOUSE (if you have one). FYI – you’re job is to change you, not someone else. . .even your spouse.

So. . .what will you change?

Will you be more intentional about doing what it takes to have a RELATIONSHIP with God?

• Spending time with God – quiet time (or whatever you call it) that is consistent and regular.
• Intentional prayer times – not just shot in the dark or “fast food” prayers.
• Reading God’s Word – not just the devotional thought in the morning or evening.
• Share your story with God with others – not expecting others to do it for you.

Will you begin, and continue, to work on putting everything you are and everything you have influence over under the LORDSHIP of God?

• Heart
• Attitude
• Emotions
• Problems – big and small
• Finances
• Relationships
• Giftedness, abilities, and passions
• Job
• Hobbies
• You have more I’m sure

Will you WORSHIP the Lord by developing an unquenchable thirst for the things of God?

• Worship becomes a lifestyle.
• Sharing the difference Christ makes in your life.
• Loving others.
• Loving God.
• A hunger for God’s Word and understanding it.

Will you pick up the sword of WARSHIP?

• Fighting for God’s truth and His standards – even if it means standing alone.
• Fighting for your heart – especially when there’s no one to fight for you.
• Fighting for your Eve – fighting for her integrity and character.
• Fighting for the hearts of a few men – having their back even if they don’t know it.

I don’t know where you are in the process of becoming the man God designed and desires you to be, but you can start by having a personal relationship with Him. Click [here] to find out how. If you have a personal relationship with God, then you can begin the process, or in some cases kick the process up a notch, by choosing one of the areas listed above and gettin’ busy.

Just a reminder: The process doesn’t mean there’s a starting and ending point to each of the steps. In all actuality, you will be doing some in each area at the same time. They are integrally connected. So. . .when you’re developing a consistent time with God and working on the RELATIONSHIP, you are also working on the LORDSHIP – putting your time under His authority – and WORSHIP – becoming passionate about the things of God. Eventually you build up to the WARSHIP step of the process as you grow in your relationship with God by learning how to fight the victorious fight.

Find it . . . Pick it . . . Do it!

Mike

Max makes some statements about faith, that, as I pondered them, really helped me.  Allow me to share them with you.

• Faith is the conviction that Jesus can and a hope that He will.
• Faith is not (my emphasis) the belief that God will do what you want, but that He will do what is right.
• Faith is the belief that God is real and God is good.

Then I got to thinking . . . why is it so difficult for us men to have the kind of faith that allows our lives to intersect with God’s power?  Why don’t we trust God for everything in our lives – relationships, attitudes, finances, job, hobbies, children. . .you get the picture?  I think it has to do with our pride and our culture.

Our pride and our culture are inter-linked.  Our pride tells us we don’t need someone else’s help.  Our pride makes us a spiritual island.  Our pride makes us devoid of God’s power.  Our pride blinds us to our need – Jesus.  But, we give in to it. . .we protect it. . .we cherish it.  We polish it, love it, lean on it, trust in it, and allow it to control us.

Our culture, better yet, generationally we have taught our boys and young men that real men don’t need any help.  Real men pull themselves up by their own boot straps.  Real men suck it up. . .walk it off. . .don’t rub it. . .don’t cry. . .are strong. . .yadda, yadda, yadda.  Hey guys!  That’s a load of crap and don’t buy into it.  I remember when I used to think that I did everything myself.  I even remember telling my mom that all I had was because of all I did.  I worked for it.  I earned it.  I paid for it.  What a foolish little man I was.
Within the pages of the Bible we find a man who tried to take on life on his own.  Saul wouldn’t wait for Samuel to offer the sacrifice before they fought with the Philistines, so he did it himself.  Oooo, bad move.  After than God removed His hand from Saul.  It wasn’t Saul’s place to offer the burnt offering.  Besides, where was his faith in his LORD – the same LORD who set him apart as king of Israel?  Saul missed out on God’s power because of his fear. . .his pride.
When we try to do things ourselves – apart from God – we miss out on experiencing the power of Jesus.  I’m not sure God will remove His hand from you, but I do know from personal experience that you will not know of His incredible power.

Men, don’t allow your pride, our culture, your father or your father’s father tell you that you have to do things on your own.  YOU DON’T!!  Faith – it means trusting God’s heart, even when you can’t see His hand.  Faith – it’s putting trust into action.  Faith – it’s believing God wants the best for you.  Faith – allows you to see God move in and around you in the most incredible of ways.  Faith – don’t miss it!

Mike

So. . .here we have this young man and this very young woman in a legally binding relationship and he finds out she’s pregnant. I don’t know about you, but someone would be coming up with some answers pretty quick. And a divorce decree would be the least of anyone’s worries. Needless to say, I would be a bit emotional about the whole situation. Given their situation there would be disgrace, shame, guilt, and a whole host of emotions and perspectives placed upon the two families, especially Mary’s family.
What does Joseph do? He first decides to quietly divorce her. He was going to do the “right” thing according to the law, but he was going to respect her and do it quietly. He wasn’t going to make a big stink about it. He wasn’t going embarrass her anymore than she and her family had already been embarrassed. Then he’s visited by an angel of the Lord in a dream who tells him everything and tells him to take her as his wife. So what does this young man of God do? He wakes from his nap and immediately goes to Mary’s house. He receives her as his wife and takes her to their home – to love her, care for her, lead her, and treat her as his own. Not only that, but he doesn’t have sex with her until after Jesus is born. OK – I can see the caring, leading, loving part, but the no sex until after the baby’s born? Come on!! This guy is way more man than I am. Part of the reason I got married was to have sex!! Anyone out there with me? Or am I the only sap who will admit that the whole ” ’till death do you part” went in one ear and out the other because I was thinking, “let’s get on with it and get to the wedding night festivities!”? Any man denying they weren’t thinking about their wedding night is either so spiritual I can’t relate to him or lying.

Anyway. . .let’s give it up for Joseph! Not only did he display incredible manhood for taking Mary to be his wife and treating her as his own, but for respecting what God was doing in and through her that he waited until Jesus was born to consummate their marriage.

Joseph. . here’s to you!

I began sharing the process of becoming the men God designed and desired us to be with Alex. I found it interesting that Alex commented that men will not attempt the process for fear. Fear of. . .? Fear of failure. He shared with me that because men fear failure so much they will not begin the process. They are afraid they will mess up in the process.
I never made the connection before. But I think Alex may be right. We men won’t even attempt to become the men God designed and desires us to be because we are so afraid of falling in the process.

Then. . .then I’m reminded that the Bible records the failings great men of God.

• David fell when he committed adultery with Bathsheba, then committed murder when he had one of his most loyal warriors sent to the greatest battle knowing Uriah’s chances of being killed in battle were the highest. And yes, Uriah was killed faithfully serving his king.
• Abraham convinced Sarah to lie about being his wife when they went to Egypt.
• Moses struck the rock rather than speaking to it as God instructed.
• Peter openly and publicly denied Christ.
• Elijah ran for his life after he witnessed God send down fire from heaven to consume not only an offering but the entire altar before the people of Israel.

I used to have a boss who said that he didn’t mind me messing up because it showed I was trying. Guys, we mess up. To be honest, we’re going to mess up. We’re guys! That’s what we do. So why not mess up trying to be the man God and your wife want you to be. Life will go on. Believe me when I tell you it will go a long way with both.
Mike

Fear in and of itself is not bad. Fears can be a source of drive for us. Fear can move us forward. It’s when our fears control us that we stop becoming the men God designed and desires us to be. Why? Because its then when we start listening to our fears instead of listening to God. And who we listen to determines our perspective. If we are listening to our fears we see things from an ungodly perspective. As opposed to listening to God and having a godly perspective.

For me it’s the fear of failure and fear of loosing control. At times I fear that people around me aren’t happy. Being the oldest child of an alcoholic I grew up wanting to make sure everyone was alright. . .happy, so, at times I fear people around me aren’t happy and I have to make things right with everyone rather than listening to God.

These are my fears. What are your fears? What keeps you from being the man God designed and desires you to be?

Comment here or click on the “Contact Me” page below and email me.

Mike

Manliness

In his book, Manliness, Harvard professor Harvey Mansfield makes a compelling case that our society should stop looking at manliness as a curse and start embracing it as a virtue. It did not take long for the liberal media to begin howling at this rising moon with a clamor of protest. According to Mansfield, manliness “seeks and welcomes drama, and prefers times of war, conflict and risk.” Manliness asserts itself, craves adventure, loves action and power in a distinctively different way than women. Manliness desires the heart of a woman and seeks to protect and provide for her. It is this manliness that benefits and protects our culture especially in times of danger and war.

The Wall Street Journal last week reported that schools, parks and clubs across the nation that are removing diving boards from pools, and children are stopped from playing the game of tag. Why? The fear of someone getting hurt and filing lawsuits. This may be what therapists call a presenting problem. In fact, the culture is growing increasingly weary and suspicious of manliness. Boys are full of recklessness on
playgrounds and this frightens leaders in our litigious environment.

Where will the lack of manliness lead us? My guess is that it leads to a growing insecurity among males who find it confusing to even define “maleness” much less “manliness.” It leads to extreme expressions by males who have no role models of responsible masculinity. All too many males are acting in violence and predatory sexual nature both in reality television and reality. It leads to a timidity in leadership and a willingness to place an increasing burden on women to provide and protect themselves.

The ultimate expression of masculinity is Jesus Christ. He refused to be passive, accepted responsibility and awaited a greater reward. For the men who followed him, Jesus modeled what a man was to do in the face of violent opposition, and how a man was to stand firm in the face of overwhelming opposition. He elevated and honored women like no man in history. Jesus was and is the ultimate model of manliness for what He did when He died a shameful death in my place. You can trust him as your Savior, and you can also trust him to show you how to be genuinely manly.

Ed Litton

You see, if you can’t or don’t have a passion for God – His ways, His heart, His desires, then there’s no way on this side of heaven you will ever become the man He intends for you to be. We have to learn to love God no matter what. That’s exactly what I have had to do over the last year and a half. On May 8, 2005 the most incredible women I have ever known went to “dance with her Jesus and worship her God” (her words). Since then I’ve had to learn to love the heart of God is new ways. In the midst of my deepest valley I had to learn to love the things of God. It sounds so right, and it is. But, admittedly, it’s never easy. Then there’s the doing it – loving God and having an unquenchable passion for Him. I can honestly say that I am coming to that point in my life. It’s not been an easy journey for me, but man am I glad I’m here.
What about you, sir? Do you have a passion for the things of God. Do you set aside time each day to spend with the Father – to get to know His character? Do you know what He desires of you? Do you spend intentional time in His Word. Do you yearn to hear the whisper of His voice or His tap at the door of your heart?

I have always been in awe of my best friend, Stacey. We used to serve together at The Legacy Church – he was the student pastor and I was just an intern/interim staff member. But I will always remember how, even in the middle of the day, he would urgently rush into his office and close the door behind him. I asked him one day if everything was alright? His response? “God’s calling me and I’ve gotta spend some time with Him.” So Stacey would lock the world away and spend time with God – reading His word. . .praying. . .worshiping. . .seeking. Thanks Stacey for being an example for so many of us who are not hungry for the heart of God. Thank you for showing me how important it is to listen for and respond to the voice of God.

Now. . .take a good, long look at your beauty, the woman God has so graciously blessed you with. Do you have a passion for her? Do you long to know her – her heart, her mind, her thoughts, her longings?

Jesus said to you and me – the church – “I will never leave you, nor forsake you.“ I love the way the New Living Translation says it – “I will never fail you. I will never abandon you.” Do you get this guys. Jesus told His bride that He will never fail her and never forsake her for something or someone else. For what or who are you forsaking your wife? Your job, your hobby – hunting, fishing, golf, etc. – Saturday or Sunday sports, pornography, the internet, friends, your buddies, another woman? I don’t know, but you do. If you are going to lead like Jesus you must also learn to love like Jesus. Want to be the man God has always designed and desires you to be? Don’t forsake. . .don’t abandon, your Eve.

Gentlemen, if you develop a passion for your King and for your beauty – in that order – all other relationships will fall into place and you will be well on your way to becoming the man God designed and desires you to be.

Mike

I’m not sure I really know – so, I’m going to take a shot at it. I think we begin with a relationship. Yep, relationship. I believe every man was created to experience a relationship with God. Early on God was in relationship with man – the first man, Adam. In Genesis 3:8 we find God strolling through the garden with Adam. Now I find it hard to believe this was the first time God took a walk in the park with Adam. After all, He gave Adam explicit instructions about what he could and what he couldn’t do.

But Adam screwed everything up – not like we haven’t, eh? And because of his sin, God – Holy God – could no longer be in a relationship with man. The cool thing is that He still longed to have a relationship with every man, so He created a way – He gave us Jesus. Through Jesus’ death on the cross, we – you and I – are now able to have a personal relationship with God.

So. . .yeah, I think it all begins with a personal relationship with God. But it doesn’t end there. As men, we must cultivate that relationship. We must work at getting to know God. Not knowing Him like I know President Bush – I know of him, but I don’t REALLY know him, but knowing God intimately – don’t be afraid of this word, men. We need to get to know him better than we know our wives or girlfriends – for some of us, that’s not saying much. We need to get to Him better than our best friend – now that could be saying a lot. Actually, we need to get to know God better than our favorite hunting or fishing spot, favorite slope, favorite team, favorite restaurant, favorite - you fill in the blank. We need to experience God!

I also think it’s important that our children know how important our relationship with God is. We tell them we’re saved and want them to have a relationship with Him one day, as well. But have you ever told your children how you came to have a personal relationship with the Lord? Do they know when and where you were? How old you were? Who introduced you to Jesus? I was 42 years old before I heard how my father came to a personal relationship with Jesus. It’s not that he didn’t want to tell me – as a matter of fact, when I asked, he jumped at the chance. It was wonderful and very exciting for me to hear his personal testimony. Guys, don’t wait that long to share with your children your personal testimony.

And if you don’t have a personal testimony click here to go to an interactive presentation that will explain why and how you can have a personal relationship with God, through Jesus, and begin the process of becoming the man God designed and desires you to become.

Mike