I’m not so sure we do. For some reason when a son turns 18 he’s considered an adult and expected to act like an adult. But just because we are another year older doesn’t mean we are treated any differently or act any differently. Those of you who work with middle school, high school, and college students know this first hand.

I think for me, whether it was planned or not, my rite of passage was when my dad invited me to wax my truck while I was in high school. I’ll never forget that Saturday. It was huge for me. Dad asked me to help him wax the truck – the one he was going to give to me when he thought I was ready for that kind of responsibility. It wasn’t any truck. It was a ‘69 Chevy Custom with a factory installed 396 c.i. motor – the same engine that came in any Chevy car with SS after it’s name. He would rub the wax on and I would remove it. OK, if any of you know what it’s like to hand wax a truck with paste wax you know where I’m going. Removing the wax – and I mean every place it had put on had to have it removed – was not the easiest thing in the world. After that, I liked putting it on much more. But dad invited me into the man’s world of cars. . .his world. He put expectations on me from that day forward – take care of the truck and help with the other vehicles. That meant doing the routine checking of oil, water, and air in the tires. That meant changing out the points and the spark plugs – yes, we used to change our own points and rotors in the distributor. Something was different now. Something had changed. I cared about the truck and the what happened to the other cars. I looked after them when Dad was out of town. He was there to help or lend advice when I couldn’t figure it out, but it was up to me now.

For some it’s going on the hunt and getting that first deer with dad. For some it’s the first car or the driver’s license. For some, sadly enough, there’s nothing to tell a boy he’s now a man. And they live like it. There’s no expectation of how he’s supposed to act. Some overcome it, but many do not.

So. . .did you go through a rite of passage with your father? If so, what was it? If not, would you have wanted to? Does it really matter all that much these days? I’m very much interested in finding out your thoughts on this matter.

Relative to this matter, I’m praying about a possible opportunity to go to Africa this summer. If it’s God’s desire for me to go I will work with pastors and men, but I will also get the opportunity to talk with these men about their rites of passage for their young men. I hear the Massai tribe has a pretty intense ritual. I would love to hear it from them and talk to some of them that have gone through it.

Be the man!

Mike